Monday, December 27

Crisis of Faith Originally Published 11/30/21 on Facebook

"We are all creators." This statement was part of a beautiful verbal essay by the lady leading a local writing group yesterday. I immediately jotted down her statement and listened.
I am in the throes of a deep, excuse the overused phrase, "crisis of faith." I have been for quite awhile. My beliefs in G-d, a Higher Power, etc. are practically non-existent at the moment. I currently consider myself an agnostic that believes in the power of prayer and spreading good energy.
I think much of my current views are centered around many church leaders picking and choosing, and sometimes woefully misinterpreting scripture to suit their own needs. The politics screamed from pulpits angers me as well.
I do continue to believe, as my maternal Grandmother taught me, we all have a light within us. The Quaker teachings she learned as a child and passed down to me have stayed.
It is not within the church walls I experience a greater power or the peace many find beneath a steeple. It is looking at the stars at night or the falling leaves on a late fall walk that I seek answers to the existential questions.
This past weekend while heading out on a trail, I was breathwalking to Grateful Dead music interludes. For those that do not know, breathwalking is a form of meditation. Look it up on YouTube. I noticed about 1000 feet in front of me the familiar "S" shape of a crane or heron, but when I blinked it was gone.
I continued on my walk enjoying the crunch of the leaves and walking into the mist created by my respiration. After snapping a few pics of my destination I turned around at a little over mile into my walk.
On the hike back to the car I rounded a curve and found myself sharing ten feet of space with a gorgeous blue heron. We locked eyes for a few moments. Maybe we both blinked at the same time wondering what to do next. Within a second or two my new friend extended his wings straight from his body and pressed down the air- taking flight.
I watched the most wonderful creature I saw that day raise and lower his wings as his round belly and stick-like legs gracefully floated in the sky. He landed about 20 feet in front of me. Blinded by the sun I snapped some pics in the general direction.
To anyone I talked to that day I mentioned my encounter. To me it was a profound event to start my day. It was not something to be taken for granted. I saw a blue heron!!
When the writing-group leader mentioned "we are all creators" she extended that beyond artistic endeavors. She was also referring to a philosophy that we create our own universe in our lives every day.
She added to my faith practice with that simple statement. My light shines as bright as it can on some days, but it is always the star in the center of whatever I choose to create around me. Like G-d I will occassionally need rest, but all that is around me is what I create or choose to allow in my universe.
The blue heron that day brought me bright-eyed wonder and peace. I accepted its gift into my world. My light shined brighter spreading it out to others because of this simple gift. In many ways, I was testifying my own brand of faith.



Published to http://kristiasher.blogspot.com